


separate, but never apart

by d_fenestrate



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Gen, Moving On, Moving Out, Separation, Siblings, they have to move on and grow apart but doing so isn't easy and this is them dealing with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:28:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26725168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d_fenestrate/pseuds/d_fenestrate
Summary: Osamu will have to leave soon. This is the inevitable. Eventually, he will have to vacate this space exclusive to Atsumu, his first set of steps outside of the apartment door signifying the start of a new beginning for the two of them.Osamu shivers at the chill running down his spine as the realization starts to dawn upon him.It will signify their first permanent separation. One where their new defaults won’t be a return to each other’s spaces, where their new homes won’t be each other anymore.alt; the miyas have to separate to grow on their own. however, this is not as easy to do as it may seem.miya twins week 2020 day 2: separation
Relationships: Miya Atsumu & Miya Osamu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 62
Collections: Miya Twins Week 2020





	separate, but never apart

**Author's Note:**

> hiya! i posted this thread a while back and just revamped it for miya's week!
> 
> i'm a sucker for siblingship and writing this kinda made me emotional over leaving my brother for uni, so um haha
> 
> enjoy!

Osamu stands up with a sigh. Placing his right hand at his waist, he brings up the other arm to wipe at the beads of sweat trickling down his forehead. His left arm falls to his side as he surveys his environment.

The room is dim, lit only by the one lamp in the corner closest to the kitchen. They’d turned it on instead of the larger, overhead bulbs when afternoon had begun to shift to evening. But now it is night, and the darkness pools in the middle of the living room, shadowing the empty boxes scattered all around. There are still a few left to open, but those are the ones filled with Atsumu’s personal belongings, ones that Osamu wouldn’t know how to handle. Atsumu is crouched over one of these boxes nearer to the light source, inspecting every memory he had been able to pack to bring over to his new apartment.

The raven-haired Miya looks around more, checking to see if there is anything else he will be able to assist with.

There is nothing. His work here is done.

Osamu stays standing and unmoving. He cautiously monitors his breathing. Any further movement will prompt a sooner arrival of the inevitable.

Atsumu continues shuffling through boxes in the background, knowing or unknowing of what is suddenly creeping up on them, becoming nearer and closer as each second ticks by. 

Osamu will have to leave soon. This is the inevitable. Eventually, he will have to vacate this space exclusive to Atsumu, his first set of steps outside of the apartment door signifying the start of a new beginning for the two of them.

Osamu shivers at the chill running down his spine as the realization starts to dawn upon him.

It will signify their first permanent separation. One where their new defaults won’t be a return to each other’s spaces, where their new homes won’t be each other anymore.

It won’t be like their first separations such as when Atsumu started to leave for the national training camps, the blonde Miya always returning to the bunk above Osamu’s, a thousand stories and excitements waiting at the tip of his tongue. It won’t be like when Osamu started to attend extra business classes and sessions, the silver-haired Miya always returning to his spot on the couch next to Atsumu, a million ideas and concerns brewing in his head as he let them all out, ever grateful for Atsumu’s interest, patience, and support for his new non-volleyball endeavor.

The future will not look like that.

The Miya Twins are finally taking their first strides in completely different directions.

Or, at least, they will be, when Osamu finally decides to move from the spot in Atsumu’s new empty living room he has glued himself to.

Osamu dares to turn, his eyes catching a glimpse of Atsumu hunched over his box of medals and trophies. Gaze dropping, Osamu feels something bite at his heart, seeing the tattered, old winner’s medal from their first volleyball tournament together clutched tightly in Atsumu’s shaking hand.

He’s the same, Osamu thinks. He doesn’t want to move either.

Osamu studies Atsumu more, taking note of the tense shoulders, trembling hands, and hung over head. From the faint rise and fall of his back, Osamu sees his brother try and control his breathing, most likely in an attempt to grasp any form of control over his composure.

Osamu sighs. Atsumu hadn’t reacted like this when it had been Osamu’s turn to move. Of course he hadn’t, Atsumu had crashed on Osamu’s couch the day they had finishing moving all the boxes. And he had stayed there, using the weak justification that Osamu’s place was closer to routes of transit needed for his volleyball career. Osamu had thrown the nearest pillow at Atsumu, accusing the other for being too lazy for look for a place of his own.

Now looking back at it, Osamu realizes that laziness was probably not the most accurate term. Avoidance, maybe denial even would define the other’s stagnancy better.

Like the stupid idiot he was, Atsumu had been trying to run away from this inevitable truth.

And, like the similarly stupid idiot Osamu is, he’d accepted Atsumu into his new space with no second thoughts, not realizing that when the other would leave, his own place would be haunted by the residual unfillable void.

Osamu wonders who will move first. Him or Atsumu.

He wonders what Atsumu will do after he leaves. Turn on his TV? Take a shower? Go out for a run? A different innocuous task?

No. Osamu sighs, tearing his gaze away from his brother. Atsumu will do nothing. He will stay there, crouched over the boxes of their memories, and he will clutch each and every one of them until his grip can’t squeeze anymore, and until his heart tires out, taking him down into sleep where he’ll dream wistfully of times when him and Osamu yelled at each other while never having to leave each other’s spaces.

Atsumu will not show this to Osamu. He will also refuse to recognize it for himself. And Osamu, knowing the wreck he will leave behind, will fall down a similar path and glare at every memory of Atsumu in his apartment. He might even kick Atsumu’s favorite throw pillow.

Osamu briefly considers that they might be overreacting. This is inevitable— they each have to grow and move on.

But they won’t be entirely apart, will they? It isn’t like they will never see each other again. Atsumu already has a regular Friday vent session at Onigiri Miya. And Osamu is certain he’ll be able to find a way to wiggle into Atsumu’s new life in a similar fashion.

They won’t be apart. Separate? Yes. But nothing can keep the Miyas truly apart.

This time when Osamu sighs, it is warmed with relief and followed with a low chuckle. Bringing his left arm back up, Osamu runs a hand through his natural hair, refreshing his head as he finally makes the first move.

He takes a step. Front, and then to the side, and then to the side again, turning until he is walking up to the kitchen with a steady pace. From the corner of his eye he sees Atsumu startle and turn sharply, red rimmed eyes looking at him with curiosity. Osamu mentally jeers at Atsumu for crying, despite knowing that he too had just been on the verge of crying as well.

With confidence, Osamu tears apart Atsumu’s kitchen, taking out specific materials, placing ingredients on the counter, muttering curses of frustration as he sees how unprepared Atsumu is with his groceries. As he starts to wash the rice, he makes a mental note to drag Atsumu out for shopping the next weekend and show him the tricks and tips he’s learned through Onigiri Miya.

Atsumu walks up slowly to the marble island separating him and Osamu.

“‘Samu? What’re ya doing?” His voice is rough.

Osamu huffs. “Dinner. Here,” he pushes the vegetables on the counter towards his brother.“Wash and chop these. I’m going to prepare the other stuff.”

Atsumu looks even more confused as he responds immediately, taking Osamu’s place in front of the sink. “Thought you were going to have dinner back at ho— your place.”

Osamu ignores the slip up. “And what were you going to do? Takeout?”

Atsumu hums. He starts to concentrate on the chopping, moving the knife and his fingers carefully as Osamu had shown him earlier.

“Thought so,” Osamu says, setting the rice cooker to specific settings. “Lame.”

Atsumu shoots a quick side-glare, lips pursed a bit as he tries to think of a protest to any of what is happening.

“‘S not lame,” Atsumu mumbles, moving close to shove the vegetables near Osamu. “What else d’ya need?”

Osamu smiles. It turns sinister. “Nothing, your fridge is so fucking empty, I’m surprised I can even make anything out of it.”

“That’s why I was getting takeout, ya scrub.”

“You’re lucky I’m so talented.”

“Oh, shut yer trap,” Atsumu grumbles, taking a seat on the countertop chair closest to Osamu. He holds his head in his hands as he perches both elbows on the surface, leaning forward slightly with adeeper scowl.

Osamu returns to the task on hand, tossing in the vegetables. “When’s your first practice?”

“Next Wednesday.”

“Ok good, you’re coming with me to the market this Saturday. I’ll get ya the discounts and good shit so you don’t pass out when you set to Sakusa on court.”

“Sure.”

Osamu turns. “And you’re still coming over on Fridays?”

“Of course,” Atsumu answers. “It’s my responsibility to make your life miserable.”

“No one gave you that responsibility.”

“The universe did.”

“How the fuck so?”

“I’m in the older twi— Oi!” Atsumu screeches as he dodges spatula Osamu feints to throw.

Silence falls between them again. The room behind them is still dark. Osamu is not perturbed.

“Hey,” it is Atsumu who starts this time. “‘Samu?”

“What ‘Sumu?” replies Osamu, voice just as soft and quiet.

“We’ll be okay, right?”

“We” as in them two. “We” as in their separation. “We” as in whether they will be actually apart.

“Since when were we not okay?” Osamu turns off the stove and places a lid on the pan. He meets his brother’s concerned, less assured gaze. “Don’t worry, ‘Sumu. We’ll be fine. How’s just a few kilometers supposed to take us down when the fucking monsters at nationals couldn’t in our third year?”

Atsumu smiles bright, his shoulders falling in relief. Any mention of their win in Year 3 is guaranteed to excite him, and with Osamu’s added reassurance, it has him buzzing, all the worry and fears disappearing immediately.

“You’re damn right, ‘Samu,” he says confidently, bringing a fist down on the countertop. “Nothing’s gonna get us.”

Rolling his eyes, Osamu turns to check the rice cooker. “Something might, given how fucking stupid you are. Go get the dishes, dinner’s almost ready.” Atsumu jumps up at the task, but not before loudly accusing Osamu of the same stupidity. Osamu continues to smile.

The rest of the night is spent like any other. Food is served, insults are exchanged, and the Miyas maintain their brotherly dynamic. Somehow, this brief moment in Atsumu’s new space has the two of them comforted and reassured, with Osamu’s words hovering over them as time ticks by.

Separate, they will be. Apart, they will never.

Osamu stands at the door, jacket donned on, his keys and phone in his hand. The entrance-now-turned-exit stares at him invitingly. Atsumu is right behind him, leaned against the nearest wall, arms folded across his chest.

They’re not afraid. They’re not worried. Atsumu doesn’t shake or hold back tears as Osamu turns the knob and pulls the door open. Osamu doesn’t feel dread as he wills his legs to push forward.

He takes a step. Atsumu stays back. They exchange a goodbye. And Osamu increases the distance between them.

They are okay. Osamu knows this. Atsumu does too.

And they will be okay. For, nothing can bring the Miyas apart.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed!!! 
> 
> you can find me @d_fenestrate on twitter or @de-sociate on tumblr


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